It’s that time of the year when hectic work/domestic schedules are winding down for the year.
For most, Christmas plans are well into preparation mode. Ideally we’d like to think that Christmas is the time to spend quality time with family. A chance for kids to get excited about Santa, the adults to indulge in far too much festive food and beverages, whilst generally enjoying a break from normal schedules.
The reality for some is the fact that Christmas can bring unwanted anxiety and conflict. Old emotional wounds, clash of personalities and largely opinionated responses that can often lead to disappointment and sadness. We think this time of the year can be more enjoyable with a few strategies in mind:
Be comfortable in your own skin
Often some of the conversations and opinions thrown around the table during family time are because family members may be more comfortable around each other. Remember to be yourself, remain calm and collective, and remember – you can’t choose your family!
Stop proving your self-worth
You may be viewed as the underachiever; the one without common sense; the youngest; etc. Whatever the reason that your family has formed an opinion on you, remember just that – it’s an opinion. Trying to prove yourself will often fall on deaf ears.
Be happy with life at present and the thought of the future
Maintaining a positive attitude internally will help with any negatives coming your way. You know who you are and where you are going. If you’re uncertain about the future then that’s ok too. Patience and understanding may help with negative criticism.
Don’t be jealous of where everyone else is in their life, thinking that once again you have missed the boat. The path you’ve chosen has lead you to where you are today. You do however have control over your future.
You may not like the behaviours of your siblings. If it doesn’t affect you directly then respect where they are at in life and let it be. If the behaviour is affecting you in a negative way speak up in a positive way. For example, “When you put me down I feel hurt. What I would rather is if you don’t have anything nice to say please don’t say anything.” The onus falls back on your sibling whilst retaining your personal power.
Try not to sit there steaming in emotions as a result from constant advice or opinions voiced your way. You do have the choice to respectfully speak up and thank everyone for their opinions and considerations. Try not to make the responses personal or jaded. It can add fuel to the fire.
Lastly, remember that you cannot change your family. We all have our past, some memories positive, others incredibly damaging. Vent to your close friends if need be instead of family members. Alternately come and have some acupuncture to help de-stress and cope with life.
We’d like to thank all of our clients for your continued support and loyalty. We genuinely enjoy working with you and watching you grow. Stay safe and enjoy your Christmas period. We look forward to seeing you in 2015!